A Response to Thabiti Anyabwile, part II

In my previous post I dealt with what, I suppose, is a peripheral issue. The real issue in Anyabwile's article is probably the sense of hurt at the way white Christians have participated, and may continue to participate, in oppression of other Christians, and that those Christians who could do something about the problem have often stood on the sidelines and let things be. I can understand why this is hurtful. The problem is that this sense of hurt is becoming something more than just a sense of hurt. It is becoming a standard of conduct. Christian inaction in the face of social wrongdoing is considered sin. Should it be? Or, more properly, when should it be? I don't think this sense of hurt can, by itself, be the proper guide for setting moral standards of Christian obligations. We may need to deal separately with the situation in the United States before we can make general rules about Christian obligations. 

Christians cannot be responsible for denouncing every evil in society. As I said in my last previous post, we will always live in a society that is not fully Christian, and people will always be sinning. There must, therefore, be standards by which we determine whether or not a particular form of evil is our business. The bare fact that it is evil isn't enough.  What troubles me is that many people appear to be trying to silence any Christian voice in society, and these people appear to have often been on the Left. Those same people then complain about Christian silence on issues that, frankly, seem a bit nebulous, like economic inequality. Since when does the Church teach that everybody has to be paid the same? By what standard do we decide how much each person should make? While a Christian ethic in this matter gives us good principles, such as the idea that people who work hard and well should be rewarded with good pay, it does not give us the exact number of dollars and cents. Christians can disagree on this issue without disrespecting the Bible. Why such sins as abortion, sex sins, etc? These sins are objective, many of them clearly condemned, and individual.

I have long lived in a society in which bribery is rampant, a way of life. It is not so much an issue of corrupt people bribing officials to do wrong or look the other way. All too often, it is an issue of officials deciding their course based on whether or not they will get a bribe, even refusing to do their jobs unless paid off.  Fortunately, things are getting better. In the older days, people going in for driver's tests would pray they wouldn't have to pay a bribe to pass. That's right; some test administrators wouldn't pass or fail you based on how well you had done. They would pass you without your deserving it if you paid the bribe. They would fail you without your deserving it if you didn't. Now, I don't think a person in that society was complicit for failing to protest about it or denounce it on social media. Everybody knew about this, and lots of people hated it. I think even people who paid the bribes hated it. Refusing to give bribes or take them, particularly when it meant being treated unjustly, was an act of obedience that should not be passed over. I know people who refused to give bribes. Refusing to give a bribe may not have taken as much courage as some forms of obedience, but it did take faith, faith that God saw and honored a small, seemingly impotent act of loyalty to Him in the midst of a system that, at times, seemed corrupt beyond repair. 

I think we need to be careful about setting up hard and fast rules about complicity for all time and all situations. While I think we can say white Christians should have done more to oppose segregation, I don't know that the same thing is happening today. 

On OCD in times of pandemic

 I have OCD and Asperger's Syndrome. Between the two of them, I lack an effective "nonsense filter." Most people have one and don't know they do. The function of this "nonsense filter" is to help people do sensible things. The problem with the universality of nonsense filters is that people's communications are tailored for those with good nonsense filters. They chronically overstate things or say things in ways that could easily be misinterpreted because people's nonsense filters get in the way of their understanding anything. In order to function, I've had to develop my nonsense filter, train it to catch when I'm misinterpreting something, taking it too literally, or taking it to an extreme. I used to get angry at people for overstating things or saying things they didn't mean. I used to hold others responsible whenever my nonsense filter failed and I took something to an extreme. Although I still sometimes get angry, I usually also realize that it's my responsibility to interpret what people say. Unfortunately, I've generally used other people's levels of caution to train my nonsense filter. "Maybe some expert said we need to do such and such, but nobody actually does that, so I won't," or "This or that conclusion sounds crazy, like something Mr. Monk (from the TV show) would do, so I think it's probably extreme." I have to have this nonsense filter. OCD is like a black hole. If you give in to it, it sucks you in further and further. It is like sin. It consumes your life if you obey it. 

A year and a few months ago, people collectively lost their nonsense filters. At least, it seemed that way to me. 

It might seem strange to say that, but that's what happened.  So many of the things people were doing to prevent Covid, particularly at the beginning, were things that would never have made it through my nonsense filter. People were avoiding going outside, sterilizing everything, thinking they could get the virus from cardboard, and calling people irresponsible and selfish for going to the beach. (seriously). How could I know what was true? People were behaving more extreme than I'd ever done, but these were normal people, not people like me. What's worse, I felt expected to go in a direction, to take my thinking in a direction, that I generally avoid like the mouth of Hell. 

Now, somebody will say, "But this was a new situation. We didn't know. This was more dangerous..." Was it really that new? I live in a city where tuberculosis is a thing, there's been trouble with typhus (or typhoid, I don't remember which) at the local market, reports of disease-laden water (even cholera) at the local beaches are a frequent occurrence, and we used to find used syringes in our stairwell. How did I live my life, you may ask? I generally washed my hands after coming home, but not as religiously as I do now. I swam at the beach even when the water wasn't clean (just like most of the people there), and I wore open-toed shoes (just like many other women in the city). Most people don't run the numbers to determine the exact chances of something happening before they decide whether or not it's safe to do something. More often, I think, they go by more atavistic, more primal drives. People fear a danger not because it is dangerous but because it is new. But the old danger, even if it is greater, is met with a shrug and denial. 

I remember being told that I must be washing my hands too much because they were getting dry. I was only washing them as much as good sense said to, and I probably wasn't washing them for twenty seconds. Now, the conventional wisdom is that it's fine if your hands get dry and chapped, even though Covid isn't thought to be transmitted by surfaces. Go figure. 

The needs of people like me have fallen by the wayside. With the national panic underway, the last thing anybody has wanted to do is tell people to use common sense, not to be cautious, and not to be extreme. Yet, these are they very things we OCD people need to hear. It's not enough to tell us to do breathing exercises. That doesn't take away the crazy thoughts, the direction of thought. You can do crazy things and still be really calm about it. You can bleach your vegetables with a low heart rate. You can stay away from the rest of your family because you have some congestion that you'd never worry about except for Covid, that you know is in your head. You can do that with a low heart rate, too. You can wash your hands after every time you touch your phone, even though you're starting to get sores on your hands. You can have such low cortisol when doing it, too! But what you want to do is stop bleaching your vegetables. What you want to do is say that congestion is nothing and live like it. What you want to do is stop washing your hands. But nobody will help you on that journey. You have to defy every piece of advice you can find on the internet and take that step away from the abyss, not knowing if you're protecting yourself too much from the abyss and too little from other dangers. OCD doesn't let you care. 

At this point, I'm tempted to ask, who's neurotic? This pandemic has made me pessimistic about human common sense and about my efforts to have a good nonsense filter. For one thing, being normal doesn't guarantee a good nonsense filter. Anybody can panic. I actually felt like I had a less extreme nonsense filter than some people. The second thing I've had to face (again, I faced it in college) is the way my nonsense filter has been about more than protecting myself from getting sucked into my own extremism.  It's about trying to live a normal life and live up to expectations that I be a normal person. Maybe I've put living a normal life before my own safety. I have to admit there's resentment there. It seems unfair that there are people being more extreme than I ever was and "getting away with it". I'm not sure what the future is for me and my nonsense filter. I'm pretty sure now that I can't trust other people to teach me what my nonsense filter should filter out. 

For all of you out there hyperventilating and saying "She's going to get Covid! She's going to kill us all!" I reply, "I'm not stupid, and I'm not going to act stupid. I'm just done being messed with." 

Power or Justice

 In the wake of the election of Donald Trump, many disgruntled Christians have accused Trump voters of seeking power at a cost and have said that Christians should have "laid down their arms." I think those who characterize Trump voters as power seekers are misframing the issue, at least, misframing the way many Trump voters, particularly reluctant Trump voters, saw their decision. 

First, people characterize a vote for Trump as a desire for power. That wasn't my perception. Since when is wanting to be allowed to follow your conscience "seeking power"? Since when is voting for your alma mater not to be defunded for requiring Biblical sexual conduct "seeking power"? 

Now, I agree that there are times to allow yourself to be persecuted and mistreated for the sake of the Gospel, but that is a different business to merely giving up power. When it is a necessity, it is a solemn one. If we are to undertake such a thing, we must understand what we are doing in the right terms. In a few words, we are permitting people to sin against us. More than that, we are promoting government injustice. Persecution of Christians is injustice. In temporal terms, it generally violates the Constitution, an agreement the government has sworn to uphold. Whatever the faults in the Constitution, it is still a promise our government has made. The Bible commands people to be true to their words. In eternal terms, it is unjust because it inverts the purpose of government. According to Scripture, the government ought to punish wrongdoing and praise righteousness. Persecution of Christians punishes righteousness and rewards wrongdoing. When governments persecute Christians, they have gone mad and are substituting our good for theirs. That is, they are doing us eternal good while harming themselves. Is it not selfish, then, for us to court persecution without giving our potential persecutors every  possible warning of what the result of their actions is likely to be? Do we do an abuser good by allowing him to pummel us if, by legal and legitimate (if unpleasant) means we can restrain the abuser and prevent him from committing further sin? So what if the abuser complains that we should have born our persecution patiently? We know where such statements come from and what their real motive is. 

Now, all this presupposes that the means at hand are legal and legitimate. If a vote for Trump was not a legitimate means, by all means tell me why, but don't imagine that "giving up power" is a light matter merely to be undertaken because the alternative "looks bad" in the world's eyes.  

A word of conciliation: It is true that many Christians who supported Donald Trump have an idolatrous vision of him. Some see him as a kind of messiah. Such thinking is disturbing and wrong. Brothers and sisters in conservative denominations: This should not be! Pastors, preach against it! Let us have no illusions about this man.